Ganpat Rai

Poor villager named GANPAT RAI (who really needs a job) is being interviewed by Britisher, Colonel Smith.

Col.Smith: Haan toh Gaand Fat rahai (Ganpat-Rai)

Ganpat Rai: Nahi sir, jayada nahi... (very nervously)

Col. Smith:Kya 'jyada nahi' bolta hai, tumhara application me likha Hua hai Gand fat rahai. (in anger)

Ganpat Rai : Theekh hai mai baap, likha hai to fat raha hoga gaand. (innocently surrendered under the accented understanding)

Col. Smith:To Tum Daily marata hai (tum delhi me rahta hai)? (general enquiry)

Ganpat Rai: Nahi sir, kabhi kabhi... (very innocently)

Col. Smith:Gand fatrahai, idhar aaoo, kya 'kabhi kabhi' bolta hai? Tumhara application mein likha hua hai ki tum Daily marata hai.(yet again, enquiry in anger)

Ganpat Rai : Theek hai mai bap, likha hai to marvata honga. The Ganpat Rai was employed on one condition that he will do whatever Col.Smith's family asks him to do.(innocently surrendered under the accented understanding)

Col. Smith: Gand fatrahai...

Ganpatrai : Ji maalik...

Col. Smith: Aaj tum ko 3 kaam karnee kaa haai

Ganpatrai : Hukum Sarkaar

Col. Smith: Tum pehla hamaari beti ko chodenga (drop her off)... baad mein hamaari biwi ko chodenga...aur uske baad mein hum ko chodenga. (delieverables for the day)

Ganpatrai : Maaf karna Sarkaar, aapki biwi aur beti to theek hai,lekin main aap ko nahi choddh sakta. (hmmm, yeh kya karne ko bol raha hai angrej ki aulad )

Col.Smith: Gand fatrahai! Tum ko hum ko chodnaa padhega. (angry)

Ganpatrai : Nahi sarkaar aisa zulum naa kare. (na, mere maalik na )

Col. Smith: Gand fatrahai, agar tum hum ko nahi chod sakta to hum tumko nokri se nikaal denga. (naukri daaav par lag gayee hai ab to !)

Ganpatrai : Theek hai sarkaar.... jo hukum... (finally wilfully surendered)

After a few days There is no one except Col.Smith's wife at home. She is alone in her bedroom.While wearing her bra she is unable to Tie the knot behind. So......

Wife : Gand fatrahai, idhar aaoo?

Ganpatrai: Ji Maalkin...

Wife: Gand fatrahai, hammara peeche se gaand maaro (gaanth maro tie the bra knot).

Ganpatrai: Yeh kya keh rahi hai Maalkin??

Wife: Gand fatrahai, jaldi se gand maaro hum ko late hota hai.

Ganpatrai : Nahi Nahi Maalkin... Agar maine aisa kiya to hum ko sarkar kacha kha jayenge.

Wife : Gand fatrahai, agar tumne jaldi se hamari gaand nahi maari to hum tumko kacha kha jaayengi.

Ganpatrai : Theek hai maalkin. Jo hukum.

Ganpatrai who has been frustrated by these Brits for a long time starts like a bull. Panic striken the wife tries to turn and shouts:

Wife : GAND FATRAHAI, GAND FATRAHAI, GAND FATRAHAI !!!

Ganpatrai :Memsaab...Gaand maarega to Gaand to phatega hi